OPINION: Dogs don’t need a dictator. They need a teacher, a guide, and friend, writes dog behaviourist Darran Rowe.
Dog training has come a long way. We’ve moved past the days of shouting commands like a drill sergeant and expecting our dogs to fall in line like tiny, furry soldiers.
But some dog training myths just won’t die. They lurk around like that one guest at a party who just won’t leave, despite being given all the cues (like you shutting off the lights and putting on your pajamas).
So today, let’s bust some of the biggest myths out there—ones that might actually be making life harder for you and your dog.
Myth #1: You Must Eat Before Your Dog to Show Them Who’s Boss
Ah yes, the old “Make sure your dog knows you’re the alpha by eating first” rule. Because obviously, dogs are sitting there, tallying up mealtime rankings like some sort of household hierarchy spreadsheet.
Let me tell you, I’ve had ten dogs in my house at once, and not ONCE have I caught them whispering, “Did you see? Darran ate first today. Better not overthrow him.”
The truth? Your dog does not care who eats first. But do you know what they do care about? Whether you’re predictable and fair around food.
Ironically, trying to “prove your dominance” with food can promote resource guarding—because if a dog thinks food is a power struggle, they’re more likely to start worrying about losing it.
So instead of playing ‘who eats first,’ focus on creating positive food experiences. Teach them to wait politely, reward calm behavior, and make mealtime relaxed—not a psychological battle for household supremacy.
Myth #2: Your Dog Must Walk Behind You (Or at Your Left Side) at All Times
Somewhere along the way, people decided that dogs should walk perfectly to our left, never daring to overtake us, lest they begin plotting their rise to power.
This idea comes from old military traditions, where soldiers needed their hands free to hold weapons (which, I assume, is less of a concern for most modern dog walkers).
Here’s the reality: Your dog walking ahead of you does NOT mean they’re trying to dominate you. They’re just… excited. They want to explore. They’re dogs.
If we really had to force dogs to act like they’re in the 1700s British Army, we’d all be marching through the park in formation, staring dead ahead, barking out commands in a posh accent. “Heel, Sergeant Snuffles! Eyes forward!”
Instead of worrying about who’s ahead, focus on connection. If your dog is checking in with you, responding to direction, and enjoying their walk—you’re doing it right.
Myth #3: Using Food in Training is Bribery
Ah, the classic “I don’t want my dog to only listen if I have food” concern.
Let’s break this down.
There’s a difference between:
–> Bribing: “Look! I have a sausage! Do what I say!” (aka waving food in their face before they’ve done anything).
–>Paying: “You just did something great—here’s your well-earned reward!” (aka reinforcing good behavior AFTER they’ve done it).
Dogs are not furry con artists holding you hostage for snacks—they just learn based on what has value. If you work for a paycheck, why wouldn’t they?
And here’s the best part—the value of food transfers. Start by rewarding behaviors with food, and over time, the behaviors themselves become rewarding. Eventually, you won’t need treats all the time. Just like you don’t need to be paid every time you do a good deed… although, if that became a thing, I wouldn’t complain.
So, What’s the Takeaway?
If you’ve been following outdated ideas about pack theory, “being the alpha,” or trying to dominate your dog into obedience—here’s your permission to let all that go.
Dogs don’t need a dictator. They need a teacher, a guide, a friend. Someone who helps them feel safe, understand the world, and wants to work with them, not against them.
Darran Rowe is a postgraduate qualified Clinical Animal Behaviourist with a wealth of expertise rooted in science and a deep understanding of canine emotions. As the founder of Mindfulness4dogs, Darran has helped thousands of dogs and their owners overcome behavioral and training challenges, using positive, evidence-based strategies that ensure long-lasting results.
